All I could do was read it to my girlfriend (after telling her, "Girl, you have GOT to read this...") and then go on about how awesome it was.
Quick notes for after you read it:
- "...get my stuff waxed..." Rephrase, honey. Rephrase.
- "It was said with the kind of authority that let me know that Blondie fully expected May to agree with her." That line says oh-so-much about the speaker. Not only ignant enough to say it, but arrogant, self-important, and illegitimately entitled enough to expect agreement. Whoooooooo!
- Artful ending.