The Piss Scam

Our recent trip to Orlando was a last-minute decision. Money's tight.

So, when we were considering lodging, we were lookin' at the low end of the spectrum. I figured, if, upon inspection, they turned out to be "roach motels," we could just move on to the next place.

While checking out the first place on the list, in Kissimmee, Florida - just outside of Orlando's city limits - what started out as a pretty good day took a severe nosedive.

Let's see if I can keep this one short.

I asked the Indian manager(s) for and received a key to check out a room. My girlfriend is the one with the higher standards, so I just sit back and let her decide if the bathroom, for instance, is up to snuff. While waiting, I used the restroom.

Shortly thereafter, one of the managers showed up at the door. I told her the bathtub was dirty, so we weren't impressed. She claimed it wasn't dirt, just their (sad & sorry) attempts at renovation.

While in there, she realized I'd used the restroom (#1, btw) and developed the beginnings of a 'tude. When we said we didn't want the place because of the tub, that attitude blossomed into a full-blown case of "the ass."

She started yelling (yes, yelling), saying that we owe her ten dollars for using the restroom. She claimed this was the law, so I just informed her that this was news to me. She said, "Well, for the future, you will know that is the law."

Fine. As far as I was concerned, she didn't expect and I had no plans to give ten dollars for taking a piss. I hung around just to get her to calm down - just because it was important to me that this woman knew that weren't running a pissing scam.

When we got back to the front desk, her peers joined in, lecturing us at high volume and at great length. I told them that, as a grown man, I don't need to be lectured to and I don't appreciate being yelled at - especially when I'm going well out of my way to respond diplomatically and civilly.

I asked to speak to the manager who was much more calm. She said the other woman wasn't yelling - that that's just how she speaks. I called bullshit on that because the other woman was fairly civil at the door of the hotel room. She got loud when she got pissed.

Anyway, to keep this long story from getting longer, let me just say that I offered to get the room, if only to assure them that this wasn't a pissin' scam.

She refused - at first saying there were no vacancies (a lie for obvious reasons), then saying they just don't want customers who cause trouble (which we apparently had revealed ourselves to be).

Earlier they claimed they'd call the cops on us for refusing to pay the ten bucks. By the time we were getting ready to leave, they were walking by my vehicle, taking down my license number, and saying, "You'll see what happens, now."

So, I kinda felt trapped. I felt like, if this supposed law was real and I left, the cops would be lookin' for piss n run con artist. If I stayed, I was on their property after having had my business refused.

I resolved the matter by calling the cops, myself. They showed up about an hour later, informing us of the following:

1) There's no law that says I owe them $10.
2) There IS a law that states that, once I've given them money, if they decide that they want me to leave, I'm obligated to leave... but they are not obligated to return that money. My only recourse would've been small claims court.
3) And finally, that we, as out-of-towners were unaware that we were in a crime-ridden area of town. The officer advised that we drive several miles away to secure a room.

He advised the manager who was left (the women I'd spoken to had driven away) that I didn't owe them a dime and he wished us a good day.


After all was said and done, we were a bit frazzled by this bit of drama and inconvenience, but I convinced my girlfriend (who'd been very concerned that I might be mistreated by the police) that we'd come out ahead, overall.

1) We learned that we would've been dealing with some pain-in-the-ass proprietors if we'd gotten that room - a fact we could've found out an even harder way. Actually, while waiting on the cops, we heard a guest ask one of the managers for to come up there and turn on her heater. "Low rent."

2) We learned that we were in a bad area of town - a fact that eluded us in the bright light of that fine North Florida day.


3) And finally, we learned a bit about the law, our rights, and the rights of hotels and motels. If we should ever find ourselves in a similar situation, that knowledge would come in very handy.


After that, we drove down the road, checked into a nice lil hotel, then went to my favorite restaurant on the PLANET and had what's probably the best meal we'd ever eaten in life. More on that last part, later.

All-in-all, it was a wonderful day - despite a few dark clouds.

Orlando 2007 - restaurants (plus)

I've spent the last couple of days sharing some my pictures and thoughts about MegaCON 2007, which took place in Orlando, Florida. I may not have mentioned that my girlfriend, who is not a comic book enthusiast (although she's open to a good story), and I also used that trip as a Valentine's Day get-away.

Today, I thought I'd take a second to mention a couple of restaurants we visited in Orlando, as well as a couple of places I've neglected to mention in the past. (There are a ton of stories, movie & restaurant reviews, and pictures I never got around to posting over the past year or so.)

All pictures were snapped by me except where noted.

ORLANDO

(below) The view from our room at the Renaissance Resort Orlando at SeaWorld

(above) a similar picture of the room (from their site)
Nice place, but they need to finish the renovation/construction quickly.
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(below) McCormick & Schmick's restaurant

(below) We both had their excellent seafood bouillabaisse.

(below) Their desserts were just as impressive.

(above) I had the pecan-crusted apple pie with cinnamon ice cream.
Very good, but very sweet. Couldn't finish it.

I didn't have enough sense to take the pictures before grubbing down, but I thought I'd post'em, anyway.
Highly recommended.

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(below) Texas de Brazil

(above) HUGE four-sided salad bar.
This is the classic, "I could make a meal just from the salad bar," situation.

Texas de Brazil has one price and no menus.
Each guest gets a disc - red on one side and green on the other.

Turn your disc to the green side and servers wandering by will offer their particular hot meat dish which they will cut & serve to you on-the-spot.
Eat all you wish.

Pricey, but highly recommended, as well.

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ATLANTA

(below) A shot of the Cheesecake Factory my girlfriend, my mom, and I visited after hitting Mary Mac's one evening.

I didn't eat at this particular location, but the ladies were very pleased with the desserts they got "to-go."

I've always enjoyed my meals at 'the Factory - especially the pasta (and I'm no pasta-man).

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I've mentioned my general fondness for and recent disappointment with Mary Mac's Tea Room, so I'll leave it at that.

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PANAMA CITY
J. Michael's Dockside Bar & Grill
I don't remember what we had but it was pretty enjoyable, despite the somewhat cramped dining area.

We'd eat there, again.

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Hopefully, this will prove useful to someone who decides to visit any of these places, the future.