Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Getting Dressed is Hard

This morning, I picked out my work clothes, ironed them, and got dressed. Sounds pretty typical, huh?

Well, I noticed that the fastener, on the pants, seemed a bit different than I was used to. There were two sliding fasteners and they were "left-handed." That seemed a bit odd, to me, but I wasn't sure that I hadn't bought those kinds of slacks, before.

I thought they might be my girlfriend's, but she drowns in anything that fits me and I can barely get a thigh or an arm in her clothes.

The pant bottoms seemed to "bell" a bit, though. I couldn't tell if that was just due to my standing perspective or what.

I decided to look in the mirror and I noticed that, not only was the crotch area much smaller than expected, but there was a bit too much detail showing, if you know what I mean.

I immediately grabbed my phone and called my girlfriend, who was on her way to work.

"Do you have a pair of khakis with left-handed, sliding fasteners?"

"Yeah."

"Girl, I think I'm wearing your pants."

"Yeah. I don't think they make men's pants with those kinds of fasteners."

"Damn. I was all set to go to work in these things."

"They fit you?"

"Yeah. I'm wearing them, now. I don't know HOW, though."

It was time for me to leave, so I didn't really have time to iron anything else. Basically, I had too choose between tardiness and cross-dressing.

Ultimately, I chose to be late, but like,... manly-late n stuff.

8 comments:

chele said...

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

I am in tears over here!! You and your girlfriend are that close in size? Apparently so.

My best friend and his wife are also the same size. Which makes it very easy for her to buy his clothes.

West said...

That's the thing, we're not.

If I grab her jeans, by mistake, I immediately know it because I can't even get a thigh in dem mo' fo's.

If she grabs mine (even the ones I'm giving away because they're too small), she usually chucks'em because her legs are drowning in'em.

She sometimes buys her clothes way too big, though. I think this was one of those times.

YouToldHarpoTaBeatMe said...

It's her booty, man. *giggling*


With the exception of the crotch and the fasteners, they were comfy, right? For what it's worth, a longer button down or polo shirt would've done the trick, instead of being late. *giggling some more*

I bet my husband $20 bucks that while he was "secure in his manhood" (as he said), he wouldn't go check the mail while he was wearing my skort (skooter, whichever). I won.

West said...

re: "With the exception of the crotch and the fasteners, they were comfy, right?"

It was comfy enough, overall, but it looked kinda funny.

Folks don't really need to see my bits n pieces, all day, at work.

re: "For what it's worth, a longer button down or polo shirt would've done the trick, instead of being late. *giggling some more*"

I tried wearing my shirt outside of my pants, but it didn't look very professional, so I had to bite the bullet and grab something else to wear.


Me am not so brite.

Son of Blog-El said...

That seemed a bit odd, to me, but I wasn't sure that I hadn't bought those kinds of slacks, before.

Damn bro, how many pairs of pants you have to be rolling like dat?

West said...

I just hadn't worn any khakis in a hot minute.

Miz JJ said...

Lol! I am still laughing. The description of you in your girl's pants is too funny. You should have worn them. That look is very European.

West said...

re: "That look is very European."

Well, I'm not. :p

I tell ya, if I could've gotten away with it, I would've, but they just weren't made for me.

Biker shorts are out-of-style for a reason.