I will betray you.

I will not laugh at your jokes

... if they aren't funny.

I will not agree with you

...when I think you're wrong.

I will not deny criticism against you

...when it is deserved.

I will not side with you in a fight

... that you started.

I will not tell your wife that you deserve another chance

... if you don't.

I will not tell you that you look good in that outfit

... if you don't.

I will tell you hard truths instead of soft lies.
I will be loyal without being blind

I will defend you from enemies, including yourself.
I will support you, but I will not carry you.

I will listen at least as much as I talk.
I will always love you, but I may not always like you.



I will not be angry with you for being this kind of friend to me,
For this is the only kind of friend that I know how to be.




EDIT: In case it's not clear, I'm saying that I will always be a disappointment to those who want the kind of friend who will lie to and never challenge them. I don't believe that's what friendship entails. I don't want to be that kind of friend and I don't want to have that kind of friend.